


CMO's Log

by Arelithil



Category: Star Trek: Picard
Genre: Character Study, Diary/Journal, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Light Angst, Mention of injuries, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sort of..., medical talk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:34:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25209292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arelithil/pseuds/Arelithil
Summary: Now thatLa Sirenais once again going to be home to new passengers, Emil decides he needs to start keeping his patient files and general notes organized. Enoch knows just the way to do it...(A series of (short?) log entries beginning in S1E03 and continuing throughout the show and adjacent fanworks.)
Comments: 32
Kudos: 31





	1. Stardate 76709 - Intro

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit of an experiment and I haven’t decided whether it’ll be chronological and/or internally consistent. Let’s just see where it goes. If I end up writing things out of chronological order, I’ll come up with some system to keep track.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Events referenced:** _Star Trek: Picard_ S1E03 “The End is the Beginning”

**_[Automated audio transcript, file EMH-23990916-3.]_ **

“No.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because I’m the EMH.”

“But you’re the only medical personnel we have on board, doesn’t that automatically make you chief?”

“It certainly doesn’t make me an officer.”

“Bah, details! When the USS Voyager was stranded in the delta quadrant and their medical staff all died tragically —”

“Have you been reading _Photons Be Free_ again?”

“It’s a good book.”

“Hm. I’m not sure the argument ‘this is how they do it in Starfleet’ will have much traction with the captain, but you’re more than welcome to try.”

“Don’t tease! And don’t change the subject. You’re the closest thing we have to a medical officer, so if you’re going to do this —”

“Which I still haven’t agreed to.”

“It was your idea!”

“Maybe you should have Ian check your short-term memory buffers, because the way I remember that conversation —”

“You said you wanted a way to keep track of developments and your patient files now that there will be more people on board.”

“I was thinking about updating the database. You know, starting a new index, making sure my intake forms are up to the current standard, moving the old files to long-term storage and adding additional encryption…”

_Pause._

“You still have the old files?”

_Pause._

“Yes.”

“Huh. … Well, at least you can revive Raffi’s file.”

“Is Ms. Musiker really staying with us again?”

“I think so. I caught some of her discussion with the captain when I was running diagnostics on the nav scanners and it sounded like she’s going to hitch a ride for a bit.”

“That’s wonderful! Have you asked Steward to prepare her quarters? I’m sure he still has some of that spicy apple tea in storage somewhere.”

“Oh yes, that’s a good point, I should — Hey! You’re trying to distract me again!”

_Beleaguered sigh._

“No, you’re not getting away that easily!”

“Come on, Enoch. I really don’t see the point of keeping these kinds of records for what is probably going to be another two-week transport mission. Not to mention what the captain will do if he ever gets wind of it.”

“He’s gotten over worse shocks.”

“Worse than his EH’s pretending to be a Starfleet crew?”

_Pause._

“No, you’re right. Of course you’re right. Sorry. I guess I just got swept up in the excitement. I… I’ll go and… I’ll tell Steward to get the cabins ready.”

“No, Enoch, wait!”

_Long pause._

“So… how do I do this?”

“Okay, you want to… oh, it’s still recording. Perfect! You just get the stardate from the logs and begin the entry with the line and then you make your report.”

“Is it still a report if nobody’s listening? … Alright alright, I’m doing it!”

_Deep sigh._

“Chief Medical Officer’s log, stardate 76709.7.”

_Excited clapping and a short cheer._

“You know, these do contain sensitive medical information. I don’t think —”

“No worries, I’ll leave you to it. Have so much fun!”

“I’m sure I will…”

“And don’t sound so morose, this is going to be so exciting!”

_Photonic hum._

“Let’s just hope we all come out of the excitement in one piece…”

**_[File renamed CMO-76709.7-0]_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _A note on the stardates:_  
>  Please don’t take the stardates too seriously. I’m gonna try to be consistent, but as far as I can tell, they have always been and shall likely always reamain a bit of a mess. And even if the calculation were obvious, we don’t really know when the events of _Star Trek: Picard_ take place. We know we start off in 2399, just before the grape harvest in La Barre, which is meant to be in Burgundy. According to my internet sleuthing, that would put the beginning of the show between late August and late September. Even accounting for the unpredictability of climate change, we see Picard and Dahj walking around La Barre and Boston respectively in warm sweaters and coats, so I opted for a chilly mid September.  
> I decided to use the Stardate conventions from TNG which I found using this excellent [Stardate Converter](http://rinsanity.weebly.com/stardate-converter.html) from the blog “Redirected Insanity” (That name just… spoke to me XD)


	2. Stardate 76711 - Admiral Picard (Retired)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **CW: medical talk, mention of injury and treatment.**  
>  Most of it is sourced through amateur-ish use of wikipedia, so if any medical experts want to correct me on the nature of Rios’s injury in the comments, I’d be utterly delighted!
> 
> **Events referenced:** _Star Trek: Picard_ S1E03 “The End is the Beginning”

**_[Automated audio transcript, file CMO-76711.8-0]_ **

“Chief Medical Officer’s log, stardate 76712… no, sorry, stardate 76711.8, we just set ship’s time to Sol III UTC+1.

“It would appear we might be taking on passengers again. Ms Musiker has recommended Captain Rios’s services to the great Admiral Picard, formerly of Starfleet, and he is scheduled to meet the captain in… less than half an hour. I dare say, having an intellectual giant like the admiral on board will make for a pleasant change. I read one of his books on early twenty-second century history and found it very insightful. Although it was rather entertaining to read Dr Delon’s refutation of Picard’s lack of nuance in applying psychographic realism to a time period from which a great number of personal testimonials survive and are readily accessible. I agree with young Dr Delon that the admiral’s interpretation can be ever so slightly monolithic and it —”

_Muffled explosion in the background._

“What on earth?”

**_[Recording paused.]_ **

**_[Recording resumed.]_ **

“Chief Medical Officer’s log, stardate 76711.9.”

“Supplemental.”

“Sorry?”

“You should say ‘supplemental’, since you already did an entry for today.”

“Enoch… Oh fine! Chief Medical Officer’s log, stardate 76711.9, _supplemental_. Now will you let me make my report?”

“Go right ahead, just pretend we’re not even here.”

“Hm…”

“Is it still a report if ye write it just for yerself?”

“Thank you, Ian, that’s what I’ve been saying!”

“Psst. Please, Emil, don’t let us interrupt!”

“Hmph. Anyway. Supplemental. Just before Admiral Jean-Luc Picard —”

“Retired.”

“Yes, thank you, Ian. Just before the admiral was scheduled to come on board, there was a bit of a… mechanical mishap, would you say?”

“Aye, that’s fair.”

“Right. The captain was trying to repair a glitch in the navigational array with the assistance of the Emergency Engineering and Navigational Holograms, when —”

“You don’t use our names?”

_Deep sigh._

“Dinnae keep interrupting him!”

“But… why wouldn’t you use our names?”

“ _You_ said this was supposed to be like an official report, right? Well, our names aren’t exactly official.”

“Oh. I guess you’re right…”

_Pause._

_Sigh._

“The captain was attempting a repair with the help of _Ian and Enoch_ , though I can’t speak to what exactly they were doing —”

“Ach, that’s nae very complicated. _[deletion of 00:04:12.15]_ ”

“I… don’t think I need that level of detail.”

“But Enoch fixed it so beautifully.”

“… You mean, after it blew up?”

“Now now, that was nae his fault.”

“Yeah, Emil! I couldn’t have known the captain would try to do reattach the secondary release valve without first switching off the power to the auxiliary plasma pumps. That’s just reckless!”

_Short pause._

“Okay, maybe I should’ve known. But it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been!”

“And ye put it back together in such good time. The way ye _[deletion of 00:02:48.36]”_

“Gentlemen! I am _trying_ to keep a medical log here.”

“Sorry, Emil.”

“Sorry.”

“Right. Computer, delete the superfluous technical explanations.”

_[Two sections selected. Delete now?]_

_[Deletion confirmed.]_

“Now, where was I? Er… ah yes. The secondary release valve blew and shattered the adjacent plasma conduits. One of the tritanium fragments got embedded in the captain’s right shoulder. Fortunately, he escaped without any plasma burns and I was able to help the others fix the leak before any critical systems could be damaged.”

“Though Steward will have fun trying to get that stain off the floor!”

_Short pause._

“Sorry.”

“Anyway. We got it under control just in time to welcome Admiral Picard —”

“Retired.”

“ _Thank you, Ian._ And I was able to remove the shrapnel from the captain’s shoulder. I managed to repair the striations on the scapula, and the damage to the suprascapular nerve and artery but, predictably, the captain refused to let me fully heal his injury.”

_Exasperated sigh._

“Um… Isn’t this confidential medical information?”

“… Well, it’s not like the injury wasn’t rather obvious. Not to mention the effects the continued strain will have on his rotator cuff. It’ll be fairly noticeable for a few days; even Captain Rios’s boundless stubbornness can’t compensate for that much pain. Not that he won’t try…”

“Maybe Raffi can talk some sense into him.”

“Aye. Remember that time she hid his trousers when he refused to stay in bed after… What was it again?”

“A _Daqtagh_ to the pelvis, I believe.”

“Not that the captain had any problem running around the ship fully naked!”

“True, but she did talk him down in the end. I’m glad the lassie’s coming to stay for a bit. She’s good for him.”

“Do we know how long Ms Musiker will be staying?”

“No, she didn’t say. Didn’t sound like a particularly long while, though…”

_Pause._

“Well, I’d better go, let the captain know the nav systems are fully functional again. Perhaps I can get him out of his bad mood.”

_Photonic hum._

“… Ye think he’ll get through to him?”

“Hm. I think it’s good that he keeps trying.”

**_[End of log.]_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The knife to the hip and subsequent trousers-stealing are shamelessly borrowed from the _excellent_ (German) Lord of the Rings fic [_Heiler und Schatten_](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/2104134/1/Teil-3-Heiler-und-Schatten). If you’re able to read German and are even remotely interested in Tolkien, I can only recommend it!


	3. Stardate 76712 - Ship's Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **CW: medical talk, mention of injury**
> 
> **Events referenced:** _Star Trek: Picard_ S1E03 “The End is the Beginning”
> 
> As always, a big thanks to my beta Horizon for laughing at my jokes and providing me with wonderful Spanish swearing!

**_[Automated audio transcript, file CMO-76712.2-1]_ **

“Chief Medical Officer’s log… er… supplemental.

_Short pause._

“Where was I?”

_[Last file accessed was medical profile of Musiker, Raffaela, human, date of —]_

“Of course! Begin conversion according to newly specified parameters EMH-Delta-F3.”

_[Working…]_

_[Would you like to apply the same algorithm to the remaining patient files?]_

“Hm. No, just move them to the secure database for long-term storage.”

_Pause._

“Actually, access patient file for Captain Rios.”

_[Accessing…]_

“Add a note under today’s incident report: ‘Patient refused repeated offers of treatment or pain management. I’ll try again later, perhaps —”

_Door opens. Photonic hum._

“… I mean, he tried to lock me out. But I told him if he ever touched those replicator permission directories again, I’d shrink his holomatrix and lock him in a drawer. So, I can get it for you.”

“Didn’t you try that with Steward once and instead messed up his spatial controls?”

“That was completely different!”

“I’m pretty sure I remember him walking on the ceiling for a week…”

“I was _trying_ to depolarize his matrix after that ion storm. He just got his circuits in a bunch because I didn’t recalibrate the emitters the way he prefers. So really, he deserved it.”

“[laughing] I’m sure he did.”

“Do you want me to get you the melazine or…?”

“Sorry, babe. Yes please!”

“Right.”

_Replicator controls beeping._

“You sure you remember the right dosage?”

“Of course I—”

“Because I don’t want to end up sleeping for two days.”

“Raff, I know how to input three variables into a medical replicator.”

“Mhm. How about we ask Emil for advice? I’m sure he’d be happy to help.”

“Raffi —”

“Computer, activate EMH!”

“Why did you even drag me down here if you’re gonna call —”

_Photonic hum._

“What is the nature of your medical emergency?”

_Muffled groan._

“Hi, doc! Long time no see.”

“Ms Musiker! What a delightful surprise. Enoch said you’d be visiting us again, but I hadn’t expected to see you this soon. Are you well?”

“Yeah, I’m great. I just wanted —”

“We need some melazine.”

“Yes, of course. Let’s see, we set ship’s time back by seven hours, so I think a low dose and a strong coffee when you wake up should be enough, Captain. But I should probably run a quick scan to —”

“Not for _me_ , _huevón_ , for Raffi.”

“… But Captain, I really think it would be very beneficial for your sleep hygiene if you properly reset your circadian rhythm to ship’s time and…”

_Pause._

_Defeated sigh._

“Very well. Ms Musiker, which time zone are you visiting us from?”

“You’re really not going to take the meds?”

“She’s been living in California.”

“Thank you, Captain. If you could take a seat, Ms Musiker? The scans won’t take too long.”

“No, this is stupid. Just let him give you the melazine, you can’t —”

“There’s a million things to do before we leave, Raff. _You_ said Picard is going to be in a hurry. I don’t have time to nap.”

“Isn’t that why you have a whole crew of Emergency Holos, to get stuff done while you’re out?”

“I’m not letting them run wild on my ship! I don’t wanna wake up to blown-out plasma lines and fucking fish tanks everywhere!”

“Fish tanks?” “[simultaneously] From what I hear, that plasma conduit would have benefited from some additional holographic oversight.”

“… What did you do? _”_

“It wasn’t my fault! If the ENH had just waited a fucking second like I told him to, that conduit wouldn’t have exploded.”

“I thought I smelled burnt circuitry. But you got it under control?”

“I —”

“Yes, _we_ did. Though Steward is going to need some time to get the stains off the floor plating.”

“Right… So there’s no reason why you can’t take a nap for half an hour.”

“Christ, Raffi, since when are you so concerned about anybody’s health?”

“Oh honey, I’m always concerned about you. Actually, while we’re here… Doc, would you mind taking a look at Cris’s shoulder? He’s been trying to hide it, but I can tell when he’s faking.”

“ _Serás traidora_ —”

“Now now, Captain, is that any way to talk to our guest?”

“Deactivate EMH!”

_Photonic hum._

_Pause._

“My shoulder is _fine!”_

“Well that’s a relief.”

_Thump._

“ _¡Vete al diablo!_ What the hell, Raff?!”

“I’m _so_ sorry, I thought your shoulder was fine.”

_Photonic hum._

“What is the nature of… _Really,_ Ms Musiker. Was that strictly necessary?”

“You! Deacti—”

_Thump._

“AY!!”

“I can’t say I entirely approve of this diagnostic method.”

“No? I think it’s wonderfully effective.”

“Hm. It _does_ have a certain rustic charm. Perhaps I should adjust my algorithms to include it as a measure of last resort…”

“[strained] Are you done?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Captain, would you like me to replicate you an ice pack for that?”

“Painkillers! Now!”

“Might I suggest a low dose of melazine? Its off-label function as an analgesic is widely considered —”

“Deactivate EMH!”

_Photonic hum._

_Pause._

“Cris, honey... What’s going on? You’ve been on edge since I got here.”

_Pause._

“Is it Picard? I know he can be a piece of work, but —”

“No, it’s not that. I mean, he’s as pompous as you said, but that’s Starfleet for you. It’s… Enoch said something and… I just don’t wanna go to sleep right now.”

“… Nightmares?”

“… Yeah.”

“Shit. I’m sorry babe.”

_Pause._

“Do you… want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

_Long pause._

“Look, Cris, I get it. I do. And I’m not gonna tell you how to live your life. But the next weeks are gonna be exhausting, if I know anything about Picard.”

_Pause._

“How about this: you let the doc knock you out for half an hour to fix your shoulder, and I’ll stay and make sure you don’t start dreaming? And there’ll be a coffee waiting when you wake up. Raffi’s special blend!”

“Hm.”

“Please, babe. You don’t always have to be this hard on yourself.”

_Pause._

“Fine.”

“Yeah? You’re sure?”

“Do you _want_ me to change my mind? Because if you’d prefer —”

_Smack._

“Ow!”

“Oh, I barely touched you. Emil?”

 _Photonic hum_.

“Yes, Ms Musiker?”

“Whoa, that was quick. Were you listening?”

“Of course not, Ms Musiker, the Captain deactivated me.”

“Riiight… Anyway. Would you please give Rios some melazine and have a look at his shoulder?”

“Um…”

“Don’t look at me. You heard the woman.”

“Well then. Captain, would you please have a seat?”

“Ugh. Why do I ever listen to you?”

“Because you know that auntie Raffi always knows best!”

“Yeah yeah.”

_Steps. Someone sitting down._

“Let’s have a look then, shall we?”

“Hm.”

_Short pause._

“I don’t think you’ll need more than 0.5 cc melazine. It should put you under for less than an hour. Is that…”

“Just do it already.”

“Right. Ms Musiker, could you get me that hypo, please? And Captain, if you could take off your shirt…”

_Indistinct mumbling._

_Fabric rustling._

_Sharp intake of breath._

“Oh Cris…”

“Don’t.”

“… Okay… Okay. Here you go, doc.”

“Thank you. Please lie back, Captain.”

“I’ll see you on the other side, babe.”

“Hm.”

_Hypospray hissing._

_Pause._

“I’m assuming you won’t be taking nap?”

“Sorry, doc. I have a job to do.”

“Of course. … Might I suggest you drop by sickbay this evening? If you can stay awake until then, your circadian rhythm won’t need much intervention to adjust.”

“Sure.”

“Alright then. I’m going to collect my instruments. Do you know how to access the neural overlay?”

“Um… Wait, wasn’t it…”

_Beeping._

“Exactly. If you keep an eye on the brainwaves here, you should be able to recognize the start of active dreaming.”

“Thanks, Emil.”

“You’re welcome. Oh, and Ms Musiker?”

“Yeah?”

“I won’t have coffee in my sickbay. Special blend or otherwise.”

“Ha! Sure thing, doc.”

_Steps._

**_[End of log.]_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter started as Emil just chronicling the events between Picard’s first visit and his actual arrival on the ship, like a good log is supposed to. But at some point I left myself the note: “TURN INTO ACTUAL DIALOGUE! (No it doesn’t make sense for Emil to record it, but, you know, whatever!)” I think that sums up my approach to this series very nicely…
> 
>  **Fic recommendation**  
>  If you would like to read some amazing Raffi and Rios stories, might I recommend [_Where Stars Come to Die_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22924387/chapters/54795352) by Aini_Nufire? It is excellent! (I live in fear of the day it ends because I'm sure it'll break my heart, it's just so good.)  
> Also her [_It Takes a Village_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22817953/chapters/54530101) series, which was one of the first Picard fics I ever read and I have reread it too many times to count since then.


	4. Visitors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Events referenced:** _Star Trek: Picard_ S1E03 "The End is the Beginning"; [_Divided_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22638796) by Thimblerig from the series [_On the Decks of La Sirena_](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1634554).
> 
> Thank you as always to my beta Horizon for always gleefully cheering on Emmet, and also to Regionalpancake for making sure this story actually made sense outside all of the context I have for it in my head.

**_[Automated audio transcript, file CMO-76715.6-1]_ **

_[Automatic translation engaged.]_

“Dear Diary, today I spent two hours polishing my plant collection. Everyone says they have more personality than I do. I really wish I was a cool hologram, like Enoch or Emmet, then I wouldn’t have to spend all day in boring sickbay, alphabetizing petri dishes and talking to the computer. And maybe I’d be less stuck-up and stop complaining that using the holodeck to run Rollercoaster-Racer all night was a waste of resources.”

_Pause._

“[quietly] Like playing doctor is hard. Anybody can use a hypo to —”

_Objects clatter to the floor._

“Fuck!”

_Door opens._

“[approaching] Ah, Emmet, you’re already here! I’m so sorry, I had to help Ian with a diagnostic. I hope you haven’t been waiting too long?”

“No, all good.”

“So, I had another look through the sensor logs, and I didn’t find anything to raise concerns. I’m sure Admiral Picard and Dr Jurati were just rattled because they had to fight their way through a platoon of Romulans to get here.”

“Huh. Yeah, maybe.”

_Pause._

“You don’t think so?”

“There’s something shifty about the pretty little doctor.”

“It’s her first time off-world; I’m sure she’s just nervous. Steward seemed to like her well enough.”

“Steward’s an idiot.”

_Short pause._

“He’d dust off the welcome mat for invading Nausicaans and you know it!”

“He’s not _that_ clueless! It’s not his fault he inherited all of the captain’s wide-eyed trust in the good nature of every being —”

“And none of his common sense.”

“That’s a little unfair.”

“Remember that time the captain picked up the mercenary chick on Trallax II? Steward practically helped her rob us blind.”

“He couldn’t have known what she wanted the phasic tools for. He was just trying to be helpful.”

“And when he allowed that Caitian to stow away a crate of tribbles? He’s lucky Ian found them and chucked them out an airlock before the captain noticed.”

“Hm. If only our Tactical Hologram hadn’t been asleep on the job and had noticed the forcefield being breached. I’m sure that Caitian’s story would have been a lot less believable if he hadn’t seemed to have the captain’s security codes.”

“Bah! Steward’s just too naive!”

“Well I for one am grateful for him. We need a bit of optimism on this ship every now and again.”

_Incomprehensible mumble._

_Pause._

“Listen, if it troubles you this much, I can ask Dr Jurati and the admiral to drop by for a medical check-up in the next few days. I’m sure I could get some information out of them in between the amiable smalltalk.”

“The captain won’t want you pestering his guests.”

“ _Fortunately_ , the captain isn’t in charge of medical decisions on this ship, _I am!”_

_Pause._

_Tired sigh._

“Sorry. I just thought we’d finally learned our lesson about the importance of running proper intake exams on any new passengers on board —”

“Captain says it’s a bad look to keep medical files on people. Hurts his reputation.”

“ _He_ doesn’t keep the files, _I_ do. There’s a big difference.”

“Also, nobody likes doctors.”

“Thank you for that insightful observation. Look, do you want my help with this or not?”

“Hmph.”

_Pause._

“Well?”

“Yeah alright. But be subtle!”

“I’m always subtle!”

 _“Pfft._ Remember that time a stranger dragged the unconscious captain on board, and you tried to talk her into letting you sedate her?”

“I told you from the start that was a stupid idea!”

“[heavily accented] Oooohh, Alex, that booboo looks so painful, let me give you a hypo that’s definitely totally not a sedative. I would never dream of sedating a patient! I don’t even know why I’m bringing that up —”

“I’m so sorry I was too focused on keeping the captain alive to spare much processing power for subterfuge!”

“[heavily accented] You just go ahead and wander the ship unsupervised while I wave my toys over the captain, I’m sure there’s noooothing suspicious about you dragging him in, concussed and unconscious…”

“They were both suffocating from the same chemical burns and had clearly been caught in the same explosion and she — Ugh, I’m not arguing this with you again! We should have just trusted her from the start.”

“You’re as bad as Steward!”

“And as you may recall, I turned out to be right!”

“Whatever.”

_Pause._

“So… You’re gonna help?”

“Of course.”

“Okay. I’ll ask Musiker about the Admiral, you put the squeeze on Doctor Blondie. Talk about… petri dishes or something.”

“What?”

“Nothing. You coming Rollercoaster Racing later?”

“I think Steward is trying to set up a study for the Admiral on the holodeck.”

“Great, it’ll be warmed up.”

“Don’t come running to me if he deletes your programme.”

“Bah. I’ve got copies.”

“Ha! Well, good luck, then.”

_Steps. Metallic clattering._

“… Emmet, why are there hypo-cartridges all over my floor?”

“… Overzealous cleaning bots?”

“And why is… Emmet, is my log running?!”

“… Oh no, a tactical emergency on deck five. Gotta go.”

_Photonic hum._

_Beleaguered sigh._

**_[End of log.]_ **


End file.
